Performance Enhancer

Sometimes you just need a little something extra to pimp you up..

Haha. After Neuroscience,

1. Delete mugged Neuroscience items.

2. Right click "Recycle Bin".

3. Click "Empty Recycle Bin".

4. Download 149354358 MB of MB.

All the best guys! Not much longer!

Lest Darkness Befall

Lest Darkness Befall, originally uploaded by jonkk.

Walk while there is still light..
..lest darkness befall.

And Chlamydia psittaci.

Mug mug mug..

The room of a Medical Hostelite, at Six a.m. on a Tuesday morning..

(this is not just a posed picture!)

Woke up at 3.30am and checked my email to see Neuroscience notes in my Inbox.

Better than coffee.

Thank you Glenn for sharing your notes so graciously with all of us. You're really a blessing!

来不及！

For the benefit of non-native speakers (like myself), the above means "boh si kan liao" (in Hokkien), or "not enough time to finish" in Ang Moh speak.

Anyway, with seven days due to Neuroscience and Microbiology Pros, time is definitely of the essence. 

Since I have no notes or tables to share (because really - I don't!), I shall share some of my time-saving, efficiency-increasing tips:

1. Maximise every minute

Every moment matters. Read while waiting for the bus. Read while queuing up. 

Memorise little factoids before you go off to queue up for your food, so you can keep reciting and committing it to memory while waiting.

Read while taking a dump (ie. defecating), just remember to wash your hands and watch where you place your books. Especially library books, to reduce fomite transmission.

On the other end of the GI tract, you may want to study over lunch. However, I believe it's more efficient having a quick uninterrupted lunch than to study over lunch. Lunch time is also a good break from the books, if you think about it.

2. Health is important

If you fall sick, productivity decreases. Time is wasted.

Take more fruit. Don't skip meals. GET SUFFICIENT REST.

Exercise is good and definitely important. Go for a jog after a day of studying!

3. Rest is important

It's not the hours you put into studying, but the studying you get in the hours. Thus, rest is vital to achieve this. Better a clear mind than a tired mind. Take power naps.

4. Balance is important

Avoid burning out. Don't just study, although if it works for you - please do!

Keep your mind fresh by having small distractions along the way. Read a book. Go for a short jog. Go on Facebook. Okay, maybe not Facebook. Spend time with your family and friends.

5. Mindset is important

Keep in a healthy positive optimistic mindset. Time is running out, but there is still time.

There is nothing to lose by trying hard this last week, but everything to lose by worrying.

Encourage your friends. Affirm them. Give them a hug or a Kit Kat (:

6. Pray

Sometimes, especially at a time like this, it's really time to stop studying.

And time to start praying!!!!!

If you have difficulty memorising:

1. Try mnemonics

2. Try repetition

3. Try writing or reciting - uses more parts of the brain!

4. Try doing MCQs instead of mugging notes

Tests recall, reinforces the facts and concepts you already know, and helps you to find areas which you don't know and you can learn from these.

If you have difficulty sleeping:

1. Avoid coffee.

2. Avoid alcohol.

3. Avoid cigarettes.

4. Chill.

5. Relax.

6. Chillax.

7. Listen to music.

8. Talk to a boring friend.

9. Read MB textbook.

If you have difficulty waking up:

1. If taking cat naps, set your mobile phone's alarm (I usually give myself 10-15 minute power naps) and place your phone in your hand. This is so that when it rings, it will shake your hand as well, causing you to wake up.

2. Ask a friend to give you a wake up call.

3. Drink alot of water. It will cause you to need to take a piss and hence assumes you will wake up. It works for me all the time. 

And no failures yet - thankfully.

Okay hope it helps some of you. I'm going for breakfast. See you all at Neuroscience Review later!

<33333

Cover Girl!

Check out who appears on the front page of our school wep site!

TAN SHI HUI!

Autographs anyone?

Anyway.. other notable reads:

Profile of the Month goes to..

Check out this smile! Haha.

When a panel of doctors was asked to vote on adding a new wing to their hospital, the Allergists voted to scratch it and the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve, and the Obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception.
The Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted; the Pathologists yelled,"Over my dead body", while the Paediatricians said,"Oh, grow up!"
The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, the Radiologists could see right through it, and the Surgeons decided to wash their hands off the whole thing.
The Internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow and the Plastic Surgeons said,"This puts a whole new face on the matter".
The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward but the Urologists felt the scheme wouldn't hold water.
The Anaesthetists thought the whole idea was a gas and the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.
In the end, the Proctologists left the decision up to some arsehole in administration!!

Behind those innocent eyes..

Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright, originally uploaded by jonkk.

...lies Bartonella henselae, Toxoplasma gondii, ticks and chiggers.

Uncyclopedia

Check this out.

Irrelevant. Irreverent. Irrigation.

HAPPY 21st GRACE!

It was a startling surprise for Chew Ming Xian Grace (better known as Grace, Chew, Photocopying lady, Piano power, sleeper-behind-projector) at Hardrock Cafe on the evening of 12th March 2008!

Despite repeated and glaringly suspicious behaviour on the part of her fellow Aladdin-mates, she had no clue that they were executing their well *cough cough*-planned birthday surprise for her! Needless to say, her eyes were opened when the wonderful acoustic band actually said her name 'Grace' (actually it was only when they said her surname that she got the picture) and starting singing happy birthday.

We hope you had a wonderful 21st! Imagine- a free sundae from Hardrock cafe (see picture- it's the one with 1 candle) AND a nice chocolate mint-mousse cake. And the nice roll-up keyboard in that super-nice box done up by Aaron (Meng)! Just to let you know, we were sorely tempted to ask the band to invite you on-stage to play a Mozart or something. Thankfully, we were sane enough to realise that if that was done Hardrock would never allow us in again! Then again, you might have been so popular as to boot out the acoustic band to change Wednesday night to 'classical pieces' evenings!

HAPPY 21ST GRACE!!!

P.S: If you look at the photo properly, you'd notice the plastic knife precariously close to the candle flame. In ordinary circumstances, this might actually be a correct deduction of attempted arsonism. But being in a nice restaurant and all, Grace decided to rein in her more diabolical side and settle for being astounded by the surprise. And no, the tomato ketchup bottle peeking into the foreground is not one of our gifts.

Facebook Anthem

Amir 'Ahman' Tan shared this with me, and it's very true.
Study hard. Facebook. Face the books, i mean.

another one, for those missing NS:

>EDIT: NS, as in National Service, not Neuroscience. i don't think anyone's missing the latter.

Letter from a Farm Kid
(Now at Camp Pendleton, San Diego, Marine Corps Recruit Training)

Dear Ma and Pa:

I am well. Hope you are too. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer that the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m., but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay... practically nothing. Men got to shave but it's not so bad... there's warm water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie, and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you 'til noon when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

We go on "route marches," which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

The country is nice but awful flat. The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake. I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds and he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join up before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding on in.

Your loving daughter,
Alice

if you're bored! :)

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

Chee Soon Juan - Did I say that the chicken crossed the road? I meant the chicken-rice stall across the road, but left out some letters because of typo.

SDP vice-chairman - wo ting bu dong ni jiang shen me. (I don't know what you are saying).

Ling How Doong - don't talk cock.

Worker's Party - The PAP doesn't allow chickens to cross the road.

Chiam See Tong - The opposition must be loyal to Singapore. Don't eat Hainanese chicken rice. Eat Singapore noodles.

Ling How Doong - don't talk cock.

Chee Soon Juan - Did I say eat Hainanese chicken rice? I said CONSUME chicken rice at the stall across the road.

PAP - There is no chicken rice stall across the road.

Worker's Party - That is not true. The PAP just doesn't want chickens to cross the road.

Chiam See Tong - We must always stay on this side of the road and remain true Singaporeans.

Ling How Doong - don't talk cock.

Chee Soon Juan - Did I say consume chicken rice across the road? I said eat chicken rice OPPOSITE the road.

PAP - You said something different just a moment ago.

Ling How Doong - Don't talk cock. We didn't say it.

Chee Soon Juan - I have already repeated this sentence many times. I said, EAT chicken rice ALONG the road. --- contributed by Chua Kay Chuan

PM Goh:

What does being a chicken mean? Does it mean that if the chicken does not get to cross the road it will feel less than part of the coop? No. That must not be so. We are all chickens here and we must work together as chickens. We must want to stay in the coop, not because the coop provides us shelter, but because we are all chickens. Understand our chicken history to know that we have come to far from those bad days when we were just running around like unruly kampung chickens and not being hot housed as well-disciplined and efficient battery hens. We have to make sacrifices, but at the same time we support each other. So that if we ask you to give up the idea of crossing the road, you will understand that it is for the good of the coop. Only together as a coop can we stay cohesive.

Lim Boon Heng:

As a working chicken you must understand that crossing roads is not for you. It is meant for the professional chickens. These chickens are far and few in between and will require even corn on the other side of the road to cross our roads because they can cross roads anywhere in the world they choose. So for the greater good of the coop, please understand that crossing roads is not meant for you. And while you're at it can you please take a wage freeze?

BG Yeo:

This is because the chicken is sensitive to the multi-racial nature of its society and although it understands each culture is different, it also realizes that it must live within society. So it compromises. It finds some values -- a little from the Chinese, a little from the Indians, something from the Malays -- something uniquely Singaporean, and eventually it gathers the energy, the wider vision, the impetus to cross the road.

SM Lee:

(1996)

This is Asia. As young chickens, chase the rainbow and cross the roads here. Opportunities abound. You might get run down by cars in the process of crossing these roads, especially those in Myanmar, but it doesn't matter. For ten thousand who get run down one might reach it across -- and at the end of that rainbow -- there will be your dream. So it baffles me when they tell me that they want to cross other roads, elsewhere, because it is here that road crossing should be done.

BG Lee:

The chicken is a liar, a twister and a prevaricator and not only should he be run down, but he should also be defeathered, boiled and skinned-alive as an example for all other chickens to see and that will teach them a lesson in road crossing and typo errors.

--- contributed by Anon

A: Because it was a Singaporean chicken and the PAP told it to cross.

A: Because it wanted to get to MRT station on the PAP side of the road.

A: How did you know the chicken REALLY crossed the road - don't be naive and believe everything you read in the local press.

A: I don't know, I'm doing science, not arts.

A: Why are you asking him? Only MPs who graduate from Ivy League universities are qualified to comment on the real reason why the chicken crossed the street.

A: The chicken did not speak English or Mandarin and was therefore unable to get on the sedan chair and be carried across the street.

A: Free textbooks available across the street?

A: Will it be on the exam?

--- contributed by Edmund Chia

No chicken ever crossed the road. You think the chicken crossed the road because you see the chicken rice stall opposite the road. The statistics showed that an average of 93.408 people cross this road daily over the past year, of which 5.325% did not use the pedestrian crossing last month and were duly caught and fined. 70.874% stopped at the chicken rice stall to take their lunch of which 41.366% packaged it home.

But there are there are no data showing any chicken ever crossed the road. Let's get real. How can a chicken ever cross the road? It will be killed by the traffic before it made even half the way. Don't let the SDP mislead you with false data.

Even though no chicken ever crossed the road, but through the sound policies of the PAP government over the years, the chicken rice stall continues to enjoy good growth. And people continue to enjoy good and high quality chicken rice daily. So if you give the government your full backing, you can be assured of eating more years of chicken rice even though no chicken ever crossed the road.

You asked for it..

Use protection.

Get an antivirus or something.

Thanks to Keefe for all the last minute notes. Literally.

If you made them any earlier, they wouldn't be late minute notes.. haha!

They are amazing man.

We don't need no terrorists.. Hanging around!

As you all know, we  are to be vigilant regarding the recently escaped terrorist, Mas Selamat bin Kastari. He had escaped the Whitley Road Detention centre last week, on the pretext of taking a wee.

Here's a public service flyer to aid us in our lookout for the fugitive on the run:

Related Articles:

http://www.talkingcock.com/html/article.php?sid=2486

"Toilet Break", from http://blog.simplyjean.com/2008/02/29/toilet-break-4-mas-limping-terrorist-selamat/

"Escaped Terrorist Spotter", from http://www.talkingcock.com

Yellow

This is totally random! Blame Siva for getting me into the mama movement..

One more week.. all the best guys!

"It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me.."

Happy Birthday to my triplets Grace and Jiaxin (: 

I hope we can throw a great party at the Botanic Gardens soon! (:

And on a personal note, thanks to those of you who wished me happy birthday on Friday, through your texts, by turning up in yellow, and by staying back to singh me Happy Birthday to you. 

This is written for you.